1. Don't order a steak at a Waffle House. They serve breakfast 24 hours a day. Let them cook something they know how.

2. Don't order a bottle of pop or a can of soda, this can lead to a beating. Down here it's called Co Cola, even if you want a Pepsi.

3. Southern women don't fancy to smart mouth Yankees. Just remember, they all have brothers and daddies.

4. Don't show allegiances to any other school in football other than a SEC team. All the others are a bunch of geeks who play Wyoming every week.

5. Don't call us a bunch of hillbillies. Most of us are better educated than you and a whole lot nicer to boot.

6. Yes, we know the humidity is high, just quit yer bitching, spend yer money and go home.

7. No, the state symbol of Georgia is not the orange and white highway barrel. This road construction is ticking us off too and at least we have trees to look at.

8. Don't go to the Cracker Barrel and order toast. If you do this everyone will know you're from Ohio. Just eat the biscuits like God meant for you to do.

9. Don't try to talk with a southern accent if you don't have one. Nothing makes us madder than a Southern wannabe.

10. We don't play lacrosse or none of them other sissy northern games, so don't be asking about no scores, cause we just don't know.

11. Save all manner of bacon grease. You will be instructed on how to use it later.

12. If you forget a Southerner's name, refer to him (or her) as "Bubba." You have a 75% chance of being right.

13. Just because you can drive on snow and ice does not mean we can. Stay home the two days of the year it snows.

14. If you do run your car into a ditch, don't panic. Four men in the cab of a four wheel drive with a 12-pack of beer and a tow chain will be along shortly. Don't try to help them. Just stay out of their way. This is what they live for.

15. Don't be surprised to find movie rentals and bait in the same store.

16. Do not buy food at the movie store.

17. If it can't be fried in bacon grease, it ain't worth cooking, let alone eating.

18. Remember: "Y'all" is singular. "All y'all" is plural. "All y'all's" is plural possessive.

19. Get used to hearing, "You ain't from around here, are you?"

20. Don't be worried that you don't understand anyone. They don't understand you either.

21. The proper pronunciation you learned in school is no longer proper.

22. Be advised: The "He needed killin'" defense is valid here.

23. Don't let all those..We don't care how you did it in the NORTH... bumper stickers bother ya..

24. If you hear a Southerner exclaim, "Hey, y'all, watch this!" stay out of his way. These are likely the last words he will ever say.

25. Most Southerners do not use turn signals, and they ignore those who do. In fact, if you see a signal blinking on a car with a Southern license plate, you may rest assured that it was on when the car was purchased.

26. Northerners can be identified by the spit on the inside of their car's windshield that comes from yelling at other drivers.

27. Satellite dishes are very popular in the South. When you purchase one it is to be positioned directly in front of your trailer. This is logical bearing in mind that the dish cost considerably more than the trailer and should, therefore, be displayed.

28. Tornadoes and Southerners going through a divorce have a lot in common. In either case, you know someone is going to lose a trailer.

29. Florida is not considered a Southern State. There are far more Yankees than Southerners living there.

30. If you are cursing the person driving 15 mph in a 55 mph zone, directly in the middle of the road, remember, many folks learned to drive on a model of vehicle known as John Deere, and this is the proper speed and lane position for the vehicle.